The Red Flags That People Are Only Telling You What You Want to Hear "Oh, the President is always right". Actual words, uttered by an actual person earlier this year, in front of actual cameras, for all the world to see.

And let's be honest, that probably hasn't been the worst of it. And I do mean, the worst of it. Because for any leader, a subordinate who only tells you what they think you want to hear is like a life-jacket made of cake, enjoyable at first, but guaranteed to sink you eventually. So, how can you spot it when it happens?

Bald-faced ingratiation. "Oh, Mr President, you're the best President ever". It isn't usually this obvious. But as a general rule of thumb, treat any suggestion from anyone else that you are good at anything, or have done anything well, like poison.

If agreement comes too quickly. If every idea you present is met with instant nods and no hesitation, that's not consensus - it's compliance. Real thinking takes time. If people never pause, challenge, or even ask clarifying questions, chances are they're aligning with your expectations rather than their own judgment.

There isn't enough bad news. Remember that old idea that s**t happens. Well, it does. And if you're not hearing about it, or if you're always the last to know about it, then it's probably a sign that people are filtering information. When the only news that reaches you is positive, it means others have learned that negativity carries risk, while sugar-coating earns approval.

Feedback sounds polished but empty. Watch for vague praise that feels rehearsed. Comments like "Great idea" or "Perfect as always" lack substance. Genuine feedback usually contains specifics - what worked, what didn't, and why. If people stop at hollow compliments or generalisations, they're avoiding friction.

Silence after you speak. If discussion dies the moment you finish talking, it may not be because you've been fantastically persuasive. It may be because your opinion is treated as final, and others feel it's safer to defer than to push back.

People tell you what you already know. If your team's 'insights' mirror your own talking points, that's a bad sign. It suggests they're reflecting back your words rather than forming independent views. Echoes may sound reassuring, but they're a poor substitute for perspective.

Dissenters disappear. Take note if the people who used to challenge you have fallen silent, left, or been sidelined. The absence of dissent often signals a culture where speaking up has been punished. When critics vanish, you're left with a chorus of "yes." Difficult people are undoubtedly difficult and can be a real pain, but they can also be exceptionally useful.

You always feel right. And let's save the big one to last. The biggest sign you're probably surrounded by 'yes' people is if you always feel right. Because if you always feel right, then either consciously or subconsciously, you will be surrounding yourself with 'yes' people or discouraging disagreement.

What to do about it
Being told what you want to hear is nothing short of seductive. It reduces conflict, is the fastest way to get to a decision, increases confidence, and just feels good. But it's also a leadership hazard, because sooner or later, you won't be told something you needed to hear, and you'll start making mistakes.

To stop it, research suggests you need to do three things.

1. Stop ingratiation. Every time someone behaves ingratiatingly and you don't stop them, you are effectively saying out loud that you like it when they do it and you want them and everyone else to continue doing it. So, a neutral response of ignoring it is not enough. Instead, you need to say something like, "I appreciate your support, but I'd really like to hear your honest thoughts - what do you really think?" This is especially important if someone is ingratiating in front of other people, because if the people around you perceive you as enjoying ingratiation, then more of them will probably start behaving that way.
2. Make it easier for people to disagree with you. There are a number of ways you can do this. For example, and I'd suggest you try all of the below, because it will likely require multiple methods to move the dial on this.

• Ask why you might be wrong. When you make a choice or give an opinion, try asking people why you might be wrong. Or, ask what you might be missing. It will both reduce ingratiation and enable you to use the people around you to help you question your own assumptions.
• Avoid and discourage binary views. The world is rarely black-and-white, and yet it often feels that way. Employees can thus worry that if they say something different to you they will be opposing you. It's thus important when we speak to avoid sounding too black-and-white, and to try to use qualifiers, as this makes it easier for people to say something different to us without sounding like they are opposing us. So, rather than saying, "It is like this", try saying, "The most likely thing is this". Anything to remind people that there are rarely 100% correct or 100% wrong answers.
• Create decision machines. Encouraging your team to speak up matters most during decisions, yet that's when they feel most pressure to stay quiet. Structured tools like pre-mortems (imagining why a choice fails) or red teams (challenging with alternatives) help unlock candour. You don't need them for every call, only the big ones. The aim is to build a decision machine where input is systematically gathered to strengthen your choices.

1. Build Confidence. Finally, you need to do all you can to build people's confidence to speak up and voice their real opinions. So, ask them for their views. Ask questions. Lots of questions. Do all you can to encourage them. Praise them. Thank them, publicly, where possible. And, most importantly, when someone says something stupid or irritating (which, sooner or later, they will), respond positively. This can be really hard. But it's also essential, because people remember these moments. Adam Neumann, former CEO of WeWork, was reported by the US business magazine Fast Company to call executives who tried to convince him to take fewer risks, 'B players, ' and allegedly barred them from meetings. Maybe they were being too cautious (though history suggests otherwise). But even so, this kind of reaction can kill confidence and dissension.

So, if you're a President, CEO, or leader of any level and find yourself surrounded by people telling you how great you are, agreeing with you a bit too much, or just not disagreeing with you, be suspicious. Be afraid. Because it probably feels great. But it won't last. And sooner or later, it's going to come back and bite you.